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why am i such a problem? - 2/18/24

first off, im sick right now, cold or something. idfk.

that will probably be important ish later.

anyways, it feels like every time i say something i make someone (especially my parents) upset.

i dont even remember what it was, but earlier my mom asked me to help her with something and i asked her if she was sure since im sick and shes a germ freak or whatever...

and she told me to go upstairs.

like as in come down and get grounded "go upstairs"?

this kind of thing happens alot with me and alot of other peoople, i dont understand why im such a burden or problem to them. what did i do wrong???

it makes me sad

she also ended up throwing away my dads old lunchbag which for some reason was sentimental to me (probably bc autism) and it made me really sad

i also probably dont understand why what i said earlier is bc autism language issues i think,, i dont know still.

i also probably cant "blame everything on autism" or ill be a shitty person regardless of if im right which i dont even fully know.

idk what to do rn. probably gonna take medicine rq.